Trump Reveals He’d Rather Die by Electrocution Than by Shark

Shark above

Photo: Taken by Andrew Thirlwell/Getty Images

Donald Trump has made no secret of the fact that sharks are his greatest foe. While he’s never had his life threatened by marine animals, as far as we know, his alleged mistress Stormy Daniels claimed:He is obsessed with sharks. Terrified of sharks. He was like, ‘I donate to all these charities and I would never donate to any charity that helps sharks. I hope all the sharks die.’” And Trump has publicly attempted to start a feud with sharks — though in a cowardly move, he chose a venue that ensured he would not be gnawed on in response.

So on the one hand, it’s not that surprising that Trump ranted about how he’d rather die by electrocution than shark attack at a campaign stop this weekend.

But on the other hand … I’m sorry, what?

See for yourself: During a rally in Las Vegas, Nevada, on Sunday, Trump filled the crowd in on his preferred method of death, should he ever find himself on a sinking boat in shark-infested waters.

“If the boat is sinking, water goes over the battery, the boat is sinking, do I stay on top of the boat and get electrocuted?” Trump said. “Or do I jump over by the shark and not get electrocuted?”

Incredibly, this is not the first time Trump has mused about this at a rally. He debuted the shark-versus-electrocution tirade during a campaign event in Ottumwa, Iowa, back in October 2023.

“If I’m sitting down and that boats’s going down and I’m on top of a battery and the water starts flooding in, I’m getting concerned,” Trump explained last fall. “But then I look ten yards to my left and there’s a shark over there. So I have a choice of electrocution or a shark. You know what I’m going to take? Electrocution. I will take electrocution every single time. Do we agree? Yeah, I will take electrocution.”

I know what you’re thinking: Surely the “Fake News” took this out of context. Trump only brought up sharks because a moderator asked him if he’d had any weird dreams recently, or someone in the crowd tried to get him to weigh in on the “horse-size duck versus 100 duck-size horses” quandary and bungled the combatants.

But I promise you Trump brought up sharks on his own, for no apparent reason. To prove it, I transcribed the full three minutes leading up to his shark revelation in Iowa.

During the part of his stump speech where he rails against electric cars and claims, falsely, that Joe Biden is dead set on making all military tanks fully electric and nonfunctional, Trump inserted some incoherent thoughts on boats:

And the new one, I was in South Carolina the other day. Great boat manufacturer and he’s very concerned. Number one, they cut his thing down to two miles an hour even if you’re way out in the ocean. Two miles an hour! I said, “How fast can they go, like 40 and 50?” They wanted to go two until they get out to 90 miles. I said, “How far out do they go?” About 60 miles. I said, “You mean you can speed it up but you’ll never get out there?” That’s long 90 miles.

I looked at those boats. They look very safe but I don’t want to be 90 miles out. That’s a long way. But he said, “They want us to start thinking about going all electric for boats instead of Mercury engines.” Beautiful, made in the USA Mercury engines and others, where you smell that little smell that beautiful sound everything. They want to go all electric.

I said “What’s wrong?” They said, “Well the problem is the batteries are so heavy that the boat can’t carry them. They would sink. And if we did it where they could go for at least a moderate period of time they’d would be so big they’d cover the entire boat. And he said to me, he said, “You know, nobody’s ever asked me this question.” I said, “So what would happen if you’re in an all battery boat, the whole boat is practically battery?” You know these batteries are massive. Problem with the trucks is it takes up so much room too, with the trucks. I mean the whole thing is like a battery.

The whole thing is so crazy. You think if they had one three-minute sitdown with the truckers of America they’d understand it. And they do sort of understand it, but it doesn’t matter. It’s like open border. They understand open borders are no good. It doesn’t matter. You don’t see them closing the borders. They say, “Oh, we’re doing a wonderful job.” Fifteen million people are coming in. From prisons, from mental institutions, they’re coming in.

But I asked the boater. I said, “So let me ask you: Let’s say your boat goes down and I’m sitting on top of this big powerful battery and the boat’s going down. Do I get electrocuted?” And he said, “You know what, honestly nobody’s ever asked me that question.”

But if I’m sitting down and that boat’s going down and I’m on top of a battery, and the water starts flooding in, I’m getting concerned. But then I look ten yards to my left and there’s a shark over there. So I have a choice of electrocution or a shark. You know what I’m going to take? Electrocution. I will take electrocution every single time. Do we agree? Yeah, I will take electrocution.

But these people are crazy. They also want to go with energy-efficient jet fuel so that we don’t have any problems.

Clearly, “these people” who want to explore electric-vehicle technology “are crazy,” not the guy who mused about being devoured by a shark in the middle of a campaign speech — and then repeated this incoherent rant seven months later for no apparent reason.

This post was updated after Trump’s second shark speech in Nevada.

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